Scar tissue that I wish you saw .

" yes Kurt you have to rest. "

" but, I sleep all the time!! And if this is your bed where will you sleep?"

" well, I will sleep on the couch but I amnot going to sleep a lot I want to take of you, now lie down!" Then I tucked him in, and walked out of the room. I fed my cat, which has been renamed Puff, then my left wrist was hurting again. I went to the kitchen sink, and pulled my sleeve up, It was all still infected, I cut my wrists because I can control that pain when the other unbareable pain in my life is uncontrollable , it calms me and seems for a short time to equal out the pain. But I had cut a bit too much and well it got infected and no one knows cuz it's a secret, so I started washing it out again at the sink,I was an idiot sometimes. Just then before I even noticed, Kurt came down and spoke, causeing me to jump and hide my wrist super quick, possibly to quick.

" hey Krist. I jus wanted some water, uh, are you okay,? You seemed to jump or something."

" yeah get some water, and uh yeah I'm fine. Just, uh, washing my sleeve, I dropped mustard on it. So, uh rest well . Tomorrow we can do something fun, like take you to the Drs. "

" uh okay Krist. Goodnight, thank you for saving me." He said quietly and looking at the floor. I lifted his face up to look at me,

" no problem you have to realize I didn't do anything, just th right thing. Now, pop off to bed!"

He went up stairs, I sat down on my couch and turned on MTV! On each commercial break i went to check on him, he was sleeping like an angel. But I dosed off, and started to dream.

The lighting was different in the house, Kurt and I were sitting on the couch he looked healthy and back to normal, we where watching a movie, I had my arm around him, then he wispered in my ear, I pushed him down on the couch and started we started kissing and laughing, I slowly worked my hand up his shirt, then,,,,,,l I woke up!

I gasped, and kinda shuddered, I am glad that dream did not go into anymore detail! I don't care how long he stays here, three is no way we are getting together! He is a kid! I am a freak, I can't believe I even think he is attractive HE IS A KID!!! oh gosh, he would think I was a perv if he knew, I don't care what I feel I can't let him know, I want him to feel safe here because he is safe here, I would hate for him to go back to the street just cuz I get a bit obsessed with my patients.. I had to clear my head, I started walking around, then I walked up the stairs to check on him, his face looked flushed, so I felt his head, be had a temperature again. I put a wet cloth on his head, then pulled a chair up next to the bed. I then fell asleep like 5 hours later. When I woke up the next morning HE WAS NOT THERE! I started freaking out a little bit then I heard something, I ran to the bathroom, he was throwing up! He was here, but he was throwing up, I held his hair back for him.

" it's okay kurt, I am gonna call the doctor." He got done the sat down on the floor, all worn out.

".kurt what made you throw up?"

" I was coughing so much."

" aww poor guy. Up you go!" I picked him up and walked him back to my room, so he could get changed and I went down stairs to call the doctor's office.