"Dear Diary; today something amazing has happened to me today!" Daisy excitedly wrote in her diary. "Today I met the ninja turtles and fought off the Nazis with the ghost of Kurt Cobain!" She wrote in large swooping letters from her room, and her pretty yellow hair dashed across her face as she focused intently on the task at hand, that being recording the magical events of her wonderful day.
It really had been amazing day that day, for Daisy. It had started out like every other day, for Daisy. She got up normally and went to school normally and came home to her family normally. Her mother and her sisters laughed at her when she got back, behind her back where she couldn't hear it. This was the average day for Daisy.
In order to destroy the fungus-like ennui that grew on her consciousness, Daisy would often take trips through the sewer. Today she did this, at three . "Oh, if only people could see the real me," she mourned, looking at her reflection in the darkened waters. And suddenly from the distance she could hear the sound – a sound she had not ever expected to here in real life ---- the voice of her childhood obsession, the ninja turtles! The four of them showed up at once, glowing green in the light Donatello carried with him. "Why are you crying," the tall one, Leonardo exclaimed, gently brushing her beautiful yellow hair from her eyes. "Oh nothing Leonardo" "Do you want to help us fight Shredder? He is on the loose." Leonardo and Daisy briefly exchanged glances, and both quickly turned their heads, embarrassed but attracted. "Oh yes oh yes!" Daisy spat out, joyous to be so united with her truest and most honest dream.
They took the turtle-car out of the sewers. "We are in hot pursuit Daisy! Hold on tight!" Michaelangelo shouted from the back. "I just want to raise some shell!" Raphael shouted back. "We needed help w/ this mission! Shredder has disbanded the foot-clan and taken up Mein-camp!" Donatello explained from the driver's seat. "Normally we can handle him, but Hitler is just two much for us alone!" why did you choose me?" Nancy inquired. "Because we got your letters, the ones you sent to us that no one thought would go any where! We got them Nancy, and we've known you for years!" This was true, Nancy noted, she had written those letters so long ago, in her dark and terrible and lonely childhood, she had blocked them out along with the abuse. "Wow, this is the most amazing day ever!" she excitedly screamed. She looked at Leonardo again and he smiled, and for the first time since middle school, Nancy was happy.
At Shredder's base, Shredder was fastly at work on his new plans for world domination. He had discovered a lost battalion of Nazi soldiers and even more nazi gold and his power was understandably immense now. He laughed, knowing in his black black heart that not even the turtles could stop him now!
Suddenly the doors burst open and there was the turtle bus!!! Nancy shouted "Give them back Shredder, that gold does not belong to you!" and the turtles jumped out and began to fight. The nazi guns did nothing to the teen age mutant ninja turtles shells, but there overwhelming numbers proved a problem. Shredder laughed "Not even you turtles could stop me now i am to powerful! Nancy was scared but from the distance Leonardo shouted as he sliced a nazi into two "Nancy, be strong, help us! Remember the letters and what you told us you went through! That was much worse! Help us Nancy, we need you!" Nancy knew this was true, the teenage mutant ninja turtles were going to lose without her help! But what could she do? And suddenly it came like a flash – sitting in the car Nancy remembered those letters she wrote, she remember her awkward teenage years, sitting in her damp dark room and listening to linkin park and Nirvana, and it came to her! She would invoke the ghost of her poor, murdered idol, Kurt Cobain and use his righteous power to dispel Shredder's power! She did this quickly, mumbling softly in her pretty voice the lyrics to her favorite song ever. Kurt Cobain came down from the sky, dressed in shredded white denim. "Nancy, do you need me?" he inquired. "Yes I do stop Shredder before it is too late!" "Ok"
Kurt then proceeded to rock out. Shredder couldn't take all of it, being himself old fashioned and unwilling to bend to the new, paradigm shattering methods of Kurt. The Nazis were much the same and they all fell to the floor convulsing. "Thank you Nancy we don't know how you did this but it is amazing!" Nancy was surprised and told the turtles about Kurt, but they were unaware. "Nancy no one else can see me. Just you. I came here for you Nancy. You may not know this, but ---" he shuffled his ghost feet in the air "I'm in love with you. I got your letters. That's why Courtney killed me, I was going to leave her for you!" Nancy blushed, knowing this was true. "But you are dead now Kurt, we can't have relations." "I Know Nancy, which is why I will always be here for you. I was always in your heart!" And with that Kurt Cobain disappeared back into Nancy's heart. "What was that," the turtles asked. "Oh nothing, just some bitter-sweet childhood memories."
The turtles and Nancy and Kurt spent the rest of the day at the local pizza parlour, and when it was done the turtles came to say there goodbyes. "Nancy, thank you we couldn't have done this without you." they said. Before they left, Leonardo returned to Nancy. Taking her hand he exclaimed "Nancy did you feel what I felt back there?" "Yes Leonardo." His green face turned greener and he pressed on: "Perhaps uh we could meet for some coffee some time in the sewers, maybe you could train with us?" Nancy thought that was a very good idea and wrote her number on a napkin she got from the passing waitress who was on her way out of the restaurant. "Hear you go Leo, don't lose it ok" she winked. Leonardo quickly kissed her and ran off. Then she walked home to her house again.
"What is wrong with you dear, you smell" her terrible mother implied. Nancy just laughed, knowing that as long as she had Kurt she had all she needed over these foolish mundanes. She went to her room to write down the amazing events of that day, to treasure for ever.